The Pastor’s Neighbor Has Had Enough

Dear Revenge GuyDear Revenge Guy,
We have a 4′ chain link fence on our property and every time I plant something against our fence, our neighbors kill it. (they have a well manicured back yard). Was trying to get a honeysuckle vine to grow but they apparently sprayed herbicide on it (besides cutting through existing established roots). Several years ago I spoke with them about leaning over our fence and cutting our bushes. They have also sprayed grass killer along the fence line, leaving a line of dead grass on our side.
I would like some ideas as to what I could do to show my displeasure – something I could do along the fence that they can’t kill, something artistic but tacky. It’s not a large span of fencing, but it would need to be high enough so they could see it from their backyard. Styrofoam heads on poles? Large artificial trees?
This guy is a pastor at a local church…
Thanks.

The Revenge GuyDear Pastor’s Neighbor,
How I would love to run with this one…
First off, send them a registered letter stating that they are legally not allowed to touch anything that is on your side of the fence. Look up your local bylaws and add that information too. This way they are put on notice about their activities.
Next, take pictures and video. Lots and lots. Pictures with dates, video with your running commentary about what is being recorded.
Maybe they expect you to “turn the other cheek” but why should you? You have every right to privacy and freedom from harm that they do, so an equal ground (so to speak) needs to be found here.
If the letter does not give them the incentive to profusely apologize to you for what they’ve done we’ll head to the next level of “fun”.
Along the fence line hand birdfeeders and chimes. Lots of them. Lots.
Buy a cheap bamboo curtain, the type used to block the sun. Paint one side with bright neon orange. Put a couple of poles in the ground and hang it, neon side towards them.
And to finish this off, if they still are not compliant with your “please be neighborly” request, join their church.
RG

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