My new neighbor is a liar and causing trouble for me

Dear Revenge GuyDear Revenge Guy,
We have lived in pour home for twenty years never a complaint. Now we have a new neighbor who is a real piece of shit.

Animal control has posted a ticket on our door stating our dog runs loose and she isn’t licensed not had she had her rabies shots. They haven’t even seen my dog and she does have her shots, also he has called the police saying we were prowlers when we we’re working in our garden one night, he’s turned us in for burning when we bbq, he is something else or and reported that we shoot neighboring cats and birds.

What can we do to bring this guy to the reality that he is new to my neighborhood not the other way around?


The Revenge GuyHi Long-timer,
Neighbors, new one especially, are the worst to deal with.

They seem to think they can decide on the “new rules” of life, not understanding, or caring, that they’re the ones that should have to “move in” to how things are done in the neighborhood.

Yours is a particular problem because he likes to report anything you do. That means he’s always watching you.

And that can work against him very well to your benefit.

You need a camera aimed at his house (or at least the street with his house in the background. Heard a lot of street racers lately that you want to catch and report? Wink wink) and just start goofing off in front and the back of your home. Wherever he’s been seeing things to report, do it there.

Start with getting a stuffed but realistic looking cat doll, and kick the hell out of it. Maybe a dog and a bird too.

Once he complains officially you might have a case for invasion of privacy or something.

I’m sure you can think of a few additional things to do to get his ire.

Have fun with it. And send me the videos!

Best Wishes, The Revenge Guy
Best Wishes, The Revenge Guy

Asshole Parking in My Spot

Dear Revenge GuyHello RG,
I’m not looking to take revenge, not my style.

But I did ask building management to leave a notice about someone parking in a spot that I share with a coworker in a condo building (which is assigned to us and was properly paid for – about $200 a month). I specifically informed building management that I didn’t want to cause trouble, getting them fined or anything like that – just that we use the spot.

This morning, I found coffee poured over the driver’s door handle which, in my opinion, is quite childish. I’ve cleaned it off but I have a feeling, based on your blog, that this will continue. What is there that I can do?

The Revenge GuyHi, People suck, don’t they?
There’s too many “entitled people” in the world that drive me crazy. I mean, they have no care in the world about how their actions affect others just as long as what they do is convenient for them.

Since they were such jerks to pour stuff on your car the usual thing would be to retaliate. Of course you don’t want such a war with these idiots, certainly the next thing they’ll do is key your car.

Simply put, what I would do is put a “tow notice” on the parking spot and say that you’ll have any illegally parked cars towed at the owner’s expense. Or get yourself some fake parking tickets and start putting them on the windshield.

You pay for the spot, it’s yours. Protect it without escalating if you can.

Good luck


The Revenge GuyRevenge
on Bad Neighbors From
The Revenge Guy

I hate the people that want to run your life from their home or apartment.
Let's get'em!!!!!

Breaking The Hold of a Bully Neighbor

Revenge Guy,

Without our consent or prior knowledge, our neighbour tore down the
fence along the property line between our backyards and put up a
cheap, ugly fence in its place.

He then asked us to pay for half of the cost. Since we had no
input whatsoever into any of the decisions, we refused. We have a
recent survey that shows exactly where the property line is. He is
now trying to tear out the hedge between our front yards. The
property line is right along the middle of the hedge. We notified
him in writing that he does not have our permission to do anything
to our side of the hedge but he says he can do as he pleases.

We have started pouring tons of well-rotted comfrey fertiliser
along the hedge. It has a lot of liquid as well as slimy rotten
leaves. This stuff stinks to high heaven and you can never get rid
of the smell. His dog loves it and I am sure it will work wonders on
his carpets when the animal tracks it into his house.

We've planted sea buckthorn along the hedge. This stuff grows
very fast, has huge thorns and puts out runners which will go all
through his lawn. It won't go through our yard as I can keep it
under control. It is indestructible.

We have poked out all the numerous knots in the backyard fence,
bored holes in the posts and inserted stump rot.

We've nailed pea netting all over the fence and are growing beans
up it.
We've notified the bylaw enforcement officers that he keeps an old
car parked in front of his house in violation of a 72 hour parking

He has on several occasions told us that one of our other
neighbours (let's call him John) threw rocks through his window and
destroyed part of his lawn with Round-up. No charges have been made
against John and it has not been proved that he had anything to do
with these incidents. If we told John what our neighbour was saying
about him, could he sue for slander? We would we willing to act as

Getting revenge is important for my self-esteem. Allowing myself
to be shoved around by this arrogant bully would undermine my
feeling of self-worth. Is there anything else we can do to get
Thank you for your assistance.

Revenge JokerHi
Happy Homeowner,

You are really amazing to have started this neighbor war in the
methods you have chosen, my hat is off to you!

Continue your war of protecting your property line and house

Look at getting this guy into court for slander, I fully endorse
such a move. Bullies need to be brought down to the regular earth
all of us good people share. Share what you know! The truth will out
all the bullies!

I would also start an online photo essay of your property, on a
site like and be certain to have the picture "peek"
into his yard. Let's take pleasure in what happens to his yard.
Without any prior knowledge, of course.

BTW, if I need help with a bad neighbor will you share more of
what you've done?
Thanks for emailing me,

The Upstairs Neighbors

Dear Revenge Guy,
My husband and I live in a 4 family home. Last year we got a new
neighbor above us, a young 20ish girl. The other tenants in the
house are the landlords in-laws and another older couple. My husband
and I are in our 40's.

From day 1, there were definitely more than one person staying
there and they are serious night people. To make a story
short….they have caused lots of problems and are being evicted.
The landlord says he doesn't know how long the process will take,
but in the mean time they are basically terrorizing us. We tried to
get along at first and I realized when I stopped up there once that
they have NO furniture.

They live in 2 bedrooms. So when they come in at night….several
people congregate and party in the bedroom above us.

My husband has to get up at 4:30 am for work and they come in at
all hours of the night….who knows how many of them. Yes we've
called the police……I do not want to be a nuisance to them.

My husband wants to go to the basement and flip the breaker on
their music when it's loud. I'm afraid he'll get caught. I say go
down when we know they're out and flip the switch on their frig.
We're between a rock and a hard place.


When you have the power over the power, use it.

First off, yes, start with pulling the breaker when the noise
get's too loud. Give your husband the go-ahead to do it.

Doing it when they're out probably won't make much use because I
bet they don't have anything in their fridge that isn't "shelf
stable", that is, won't rot in 50 years or so.

Follow up with calls from a "detective" asking for them to make
an appointment to come in for an "interview". is
great for that. Start to actually scare them into behaving better.

Take pictures of your building or encourage your landlords to do
so. I'd bet my bottom dollar that there will be a "moving out party"
to trash the place when they go. Punks like this don't care about a
damage deposit, if they gave one at all.

If you're any good at photo editing, scan in an image of your
utility bill, which ever you have to pay yourself, electricity, gas,
water, whatever. Change your name to theirs, of course, and add
several hundred dollars to the bill for them to pay.

Change the number to call for customer service to a sex line
number. Freak them out.

Quieting down a group of pigs is hard to do, but you can make
them ready to leave a lot sooner than the eviction if you do things
Best wishes,

Red Fence Bastards

Revenge Guy,
I share a combined front yard with my neighbors. They
re-landscaped their side of the yard and put up an ugly red fence in
between us without asking us if it was ok. It is on our shared
property line, but they didn't ask for our approval.

The red fence doesn't match with our other fences and looks awful.
Also, it has ruined the look of my side of the yard.

We don't have a Homeowner's Association and there is no city code.
How can I get revenge?

Paint your side of the fence to a more pleasing color.
Send them a registered letter before you do, notifying them of your

Get a lawyer involved if the letter doesn't work.

And if you don't paint it, plant some bushes or hedges….

And every once in a while through some granular fertilizer on their
side, after a few weeks the fertilizer will burn the hell out of
their lawn.
Good luck!

Crappy Neighbors Threatened Me


We purchased a house 3 years ago and the people next door are
typical white trash, they keep a tree trimming truck, chipper and
stump grinder on their property as well as a few junk cars.

We live in a nice well kept neighborhood, they drive and park all
over their property they constantly have kids over for parties,
drinking, music, screaming, through the night.

We have 2 small children and since we've been here we can't even
open their windows at night, and are forced to turn on the AC on
beautiful nights, even with their windows closed they can't fall
asleep and are constantly being woken up due to the noise.

We have asked numerous times with no results, called the police, as
soon as the police drive away it starts up again, last night we
called and as soon as the police left someone yelled out "keep
calling the police and we'll F$#* up your house" We are at a loss on
what to do HELP !!!!!
Greg T.

First off: security cameras.

Second: motion detector lights.

Third: talk with your other neighbors, I'm sure they've had
sleepless nights too and would welcome the opportunity to gang up on
these asses.

Fourth: Liquid Ass. Spray it over the fence when they're NOT outside
but you know they WILL BE later.

Fifth: Video camera. Capture these guys in the act, when needed this
will make a great case for you in the courts, should this go that

Getting rid of bad neighbors, unless they are renters is quite
difficult. Do a property search, find out their names and do a
criminal background check. odds are good that they all have some
arrests and convictions in their pasts, so you could again enlist
your neighbors and start a poster campaign to get these bums to

You MUST have the support and willingness of your good neighbors to
force out the bad.

Introduce yourself around, if you haven't yet, and get started.
Good luck!

She's Calling The Cops On Me For Noise During The Middle of the

Revenge Guy,

I have a neighbor that is such a royal B*tch.

My roommate that lived with me for two years got involved with her
and they had a nasty break up. After the break up she was yelling
derogatory statements to him and his son. He got the cops involved
which they were not much help so he decided to move.

She has now started to take it out on me.

She has called the cops on me several times for music complaints.
They other day it was at 5:00 in the afternoon on a Friday. The
music was not that loud and I had it playing for well over 2 hours
but the second my old roommate showed up the cops were there
immediately after.

I have never been sited for these complaints and have even had the
officer tell me that it wasn't that loud.

There have been many of times that my lawn mower would be a lot

A few weeks back I was sleeping and the neighbor on the other side
had his music up I didn't care but she called the cops on me not
him. Since she is giving my address they have to respond to my

This has got to the point were I can't even watch my tv at a descent
volume to hear it with out her calling the police.

It has effected my way of living that has been the same for the last
4 years. I would like to find away to make it stop. She doesn't have
a job and is home all day. Please Help!!!!!Thank you,

First thinks first, find out what the noise bylaws are for where you
You'll likely find that the police can't do anything because the
noise is during the day and well within the noise bylaws where you
With that knowledge in hand, go to the police and see about making a
harassment complaint against her, tit for tat, right?!!

Now for the better part of revenge….
get her phone number, do a reverse lookup if needed to get her info
and post her info everywhere you can think of. (I have plenty if
ideas throughout my site!)
Make job ads for her, selling things, whatever.
Keep a steady stream of people calling her and coming to her door.

At least she'll be too busy to worry about you anymore.
Best wishes,

What Do I Do To Get Back At My Ignorant Neighbor And Her

Revenge Guy,

I would never have thought that I would ask someone's advice on how
to get back at people, but my neighbors really piss me off.

I moved in a townhouse about 1.5 year ago, and immediately I
realized that those people are ignorant.

First they younger kid brought some kids and they had like an orgie
in my backyard.

I called the police then, they spoke to the neighbors, and then the
mother became upset that like her child is just a kid.

Then they started playing basketball on the driveway (it's joint),
and they were always on my front lawn.

I was kicking out the small kids all the time from there.

Then the older kid started walking through my lawn to drag his lawn
mower. I told them not to, and that guy was almost swearing at me
like "I will not stop doing that!".

Finally this year my lawyer wrote them a letter like "Do not play
ball on the other part lawn and driveway part".

No reaction.

More, that older son (who is over 18 for sure, and who does not
study buy just stays at home and waits till his girlfriend picks him
up in her car, or when some friends come to drink and then drive to
party) walked with his dog right in front of my lawn.

That was a good reason to call the police again, and I was lucky to
take some pictures.

So I called the police. Ha-ha. After like 9 days of waiting, I
finally got a call from a police officer that she spoke to the
mother, and that the mother promised that it will not happen again?!

The police woman did not even speak with the son, and when I tried
to explain her all bad things they did, she was like "Oh, that
mother told me that you were throwing stones and sod on her backyard
" (lie).

So, now I don't know what to do. I saw that stupid son walking the
dog, but so far he went around my lawn.

However that mother pissed me off with her lies. Also also the
police did not seem to be helpful, she did not even want to issue a
ticket to the son!!

My question is how to deal with that situation. I would love to get
a revenge, however I obviously don't want to go overboard. Should I
call the police woman's supervisor? Should I spread some real
compost (from a farm) all over to have the neighbors smell it 24×7?
What should I do?

In addition that mother claims to be poor and does not want to have
a fence in the backyard (we don't have any fence!!).

So now she had some money to buy a huge table with an umbrella, and
it's kind of close to the border with my yard. So I would have to
see their stupid faces when they have a barbeque. What do I do????

Please HELP!!
Yours, Suffering


You are in a bad place, but there is no point in NOT sharing the
misery you suffer.

If I were you I'd be fertilizing the lawn every second week… just
spread the manure on, let the kids walk through that.

Have a security camera installed, track the kids trespassing, gather
the evidence for the police.

Be proactive!

Go to the police department and search for a sympathetic ear to tell
your tale to. Have recordings, journal documentation, the whole nine

Check the strata/townhouse bylaws where you are, you might have a
good case to force her and those brats to vacate/move. tread the
rules carefully.

try to get elected to the townhouse board of directors… people
usually try to NOT be on the board and go with whatever decisions
are made.

With that type of power you could easily make her living there a
nightmarish hell.

Check on the watering restrictions too! And BBQ rules, I'm sure the
development you live in has restrictions on outdoor grills, most
places do.

Talk with your other neighbors and see what is happening to them.
Many times people silently suffer their neighbors obnoxious
behavior, but you can be the spark that starts the fire!

Do it!

Don't wait for these brats to fly away from mommy's side, they

Building My New Home

Revenge Guy,
I read some of the advice on your website and was
intrigued. I would love to know if you have any suggestions for my
husband and me.

We are in the process of building a new house at the end of a cul-de-
sac street. The space is somewhat tight at the end of this street,
and there are essentially three homes there (ours and 2 others). At

the very end of the street lives our now problem neighbor.

Soon after we purchased the property, on which a home had stood
vacant for 2 to 3 years, this neighbor somehow found my husband's
work phone number and email address and called to say he hoped we
wouldn't be removing many of the trees on the property. We were
surprised at this and thought it was none of his business, but we
assured him that where we had to remove trees, we would replant new

Subsequent to that time, our builder one day came across a yard
worker carrying an expensive Japanese Maple tree, which he had dug
up from the backyard of our property, toward his landscape truck.
The truck was parked in the driveway of our neighbor's house. Caught
in the act of stealing our tree, which retails for between one and
two thousand dollars, the yard worker said he would put it back. Due
to the way he had butchered its roots, it could not survive, and it
died. We were angry at the time, but we did not feel that we could
prove who had tried to steal it, and we were eager to begin our
relationship with our neighbors on a positive note. We did not
formally say anything to them about it.

Well, since construction has begun this man and his wife have been
irrational and nasty. I went over to officially introduce myself
before the construction was underway to apologize for the
inconvenience and establish a friendly relationship. This seemed to
go well, except that the husband continued to ask about whether we
planned to remove all the trees that were marked.

Some time later, my husband got another email at work from this man,
stating that his wife observed the construction crew "dumping
garbage" on their property. This neighbor said that he expected to
be notified no later than noon that day that it had been cleaned up.
We called our builder to ask about this, and when he drove across
town to investigate the "garbage dumping," he found one paper coffee
cup and an empty Jello cup. He picked these up and we all could not
believe how crazy these people were. I pick up that much trash and
more from my yard regularly, simply from what gets blown in by the

Later that week, we drove to check things out at the site and ran
into the wife. We waved and said hello. She did not respond but
asked whether they had taken care of "all the trash." We said that
we did not see any trash, but did she? She began to shake all over
and said that there was a "red buckle" on her side of the silt
fence. When we went to check, it was extremely hard to see, but we
did find a small red buckle contraption nearly buried in the dirt,
and my husband removed it. The area between our two lots goes down
into a deep gully covered by trees that is quite shady and hard to
see into.

The latest communication from these friendly and gracious people
came last week to my husband's email stating that OUR brick delivery
truck had hit and damaged one of their pine trees. The neighbor said
that he had called his tree company to come out and photograph the
damage and that he would be sending us the bill for the cost of
their services to "save" the tree. My husband responded that he
should send the invoice on and that our builder would look into it.
We investigated and found that the brick truck driver had hit the
tree (there was one square foot of bark knocked off) and that his
company would take responsibility.

This week, when the invoice came, Mr. Obnoxious emailed my husband
again at work and said that he should send the reimbursement check
to his work address and that they would hold us responsible if this
50 year old pine tree did not make it and died. My husband replied
that he would forward the invoice on to our builder who was
coordinating with the brick company and that further concerns about
the tree should be addressed to the brick company. They were
responsible for the damage.

These people are unbelievably obnoxious and I have grown
increasingly more angry as they barrage my husband at work with
their complaints. Their attitude is incredible given that we did not
pester them about the expensive tree WE lost (I mentioned that very
briefly during my visit to meet them) and that we have responded in
a prompt and polite way to their concerns. They clearly do not wish
to have anyone build or live on the lot next to them. I have never
been one to seek revenge, but I am finding myself wanting to put
this man in his place. He assumes a condescending and accusatory air
towards us that is out of line and infuriating. I would welcome any
actions you could offer that would enable me to stick it right back
to him.
Thanks so much,
Homebuilder under attack

From now on have all corresponded go through your lawyer.
Hit the ant with the largest hammer you have.

You see, when you try to be nice these neighbors are understanding
you as weak, so they try to push you around and make you jump
through hoops… and you jump!

This will end up being a court case, I'm sure.

Print out all emails, save every phone call details.
Write down and photo everything on a weekly basis as to how the
construction progresses, etc. Ask your builder to take daily
pictures when they leave for the day, if possible.

Check local building laws, make sure everything you do is by the
book. Detail the costs involved with this heightened recording of
your building being done, it'll come in handy.

Make sure your property is posted "No Trespassing" and that your
liability insurance is paid up.

You are in for a battle that has just begun so be prepared.
Good luck!

Parking Wars

Revenge Guy,
Hopefully you don't find this situation too similar to ones
already posted on your site- we are looking for some advice on
dealing with neighbors across the street from us.

A little less than a year ago we moved into a fairly young
neighborhood in which rows of townhomes (which we live in) sit
across the street from single family homes.

We were warned by our next door neighbor to watch out on parking in
front of the house across the street, they made frequent complaints
and had even egged our neighbors car once because they were too
close to the mailbox.

In December, my husband accidently parked about 2 inches on the
grass with one tire (the other tire was entirely on the curb) and
they left a threatening note on his windshield that said "Park on my
grass again and you'll be sorry" or something along those lines.

That day we went over and introduced ourselves, explained that we
were sorry but we thought the letter somewhat inappropriate.

We tried to be friendly but at the same time stand up for ourselves
that they had never met us before and should have tried talking to
us before leaving such a hateful letter. They used the excuse that "thats
how they were raised to handle things" (These people come across as
fairly uneducated hicks in my opinion) but apologized for the
overraction. We tossed the note and moved on.

Since that time, we bought a new vehicle and put our other one up
for sale, and since my husband also has a work car we now have more
vehicles than fit in our driveway, so my spare car which I don't
drive much anymore was parked in front of their house (because there
isn't parking on our side of the street).

It was there for about a week and a half until they called the cops
on us tonight for having it parked there for over 24 hours. Now
granted, we broke the rule but we weren't hurting anything! We
weren't blocking the mailbox, driveway, etc. In addition people are
always parking on the street so even if we weren't parked there,
someone else would be.

Well, my husband and are are out of town for the holiday but luckily
my sister was there doing laundry when the cops came and explained
that we would be back on Tuesday to move the vehicle.

SO that long story was to explain that I'm looking for a way to get
back at them for being jerks for no reason.

If you live across from townhomes that have single car garages, they
should realize that people will always be parking in front of their
home, get over it!!!

I want to get back at them somehow, but I'm really not enough of a
daredevil to do anything illegal. Can you help at all? I know very
little about these people except that they are ignorant and rude.

My sister did try to go over and talk to them again tonight to
explain that we were gone but would move the vehicle on Tuesday if
they would please not call the cops again until then, and they
pretty much treated her like dirt. I just want to be able to park
without worrying every day if I'll come home to a ticket.

Oh, and one other thing, I really don't want to just park the car I
do drive daily in that spot because 1. it would give them too much
satisfaction and 2. I have a 1 year old son and usually several
other things to carry inside when I come home everyday so its really
a pain to have to park so far from my front door.
Thanks for any advice!
PS sorry this was so lengthy!!


People are very territorial; and you've stumbled across a roost of
turkeys that need to control everything in their sight.

While you can't do anything but offend them every time you park in
front of their house you did do everything right: introducing
yourself, apologizing for parking over the usual time limit, etc.

Now it's time to play their game but, you know, you're the number
one suspect no matter what happens to them.

Again, the first thing I'd try is kindness, bribing them for the
parking "permission" just might appease these monkeys, and that's
what I'd try first, again. Maybe go to their front door and give
them a bottle of booze and see what their reaction is. Certainly if
you continue to offend them by parking in front of their house (and
it seems like you don't have many options without a long walk home)
you'll be spending a lot of time cleaning egg, and worse, off your

Revenge here really isn't justified:
1. you are parking in front of their home, you have too many
vehicles where you live, didn't you see that when you bought the
2. they have more opportunity to mark up and harm your car than you
have time to fight them and stirring up trouble against these people

Making nice, in this instance, is my recommendation.
Spring for a bottle of booze once a month, maybe a dozen doughnuts,
whatever you think they might like.
It will certainly be cheaper than starting a parking war.

I hope this helps, if things get worse email me again,
Best wishes,


The Revenge GuyYou Can't Choose Your Family and You Can't
Choose Your Neighbors: More Revenge Advice From
The Revenge Guy

I love new neighbors… you treat them nice and they try to fuck up
your lives
after that… So let's GET EVEN!


My Neighbor Is Destroying My Property

Revenge Guy,

We have really enjoyed reading your posts in the past but this is
not your ordinary lover simple answer!

We have a challenging situation and may even be a bit difficult to

Our neighbor who moved into a horse community neighborhood was able
to secure a license to have a Cabinet Business next door to our

The county approved him 'even after he was found to have been in
operation 8 years without a business license and illegally enlarged
a building, had a spray booth without proper ventilation, had over
15 fire code violations, had big diesel trucks next to our driveway
and forklifts beeping shaking our home & windows and scaring our
livestock so they would run.

This man has 5 acres and he has spent so much time and been at our
property line continually and provoked and caused so many problems
that we have pictures and documented that the Court Judge with our
documentation and pictures has enforced an anti-harassment order.

This neighbor has also created a ditch with a culvert in the wooded
area of wetlands and made a ditch and has drained water/ gray water/
toxic chemicals/ in a tube and ran it under ground into our property
( We had a culvert on top of our property and it has disappeared now
under the ground. Our Giant Evergreens 75 + feet high have lost most
of their full foliage turned brown dying, (his side only) and he has
chopped the limbs off on one side (his side) sticking the limbs cut
into our fence as trophies and has been moving our fence line in on
our property.

The county said they cant see the underground tank he put in to
drain the water into our pasture that has been over 5 feet high and
has flooded our barn. So they cant make him dig it up.

Now we are up 500 feet up a hill, no flooding here but he has taken
his wetlands and drained them into our property, drying his and
flooding ours.

We called EPA and conservation and we are waiting.

By the way the last business was also a cabinet business shut down
there because of illegal dumping chemicals.

This guy is an arrogant and intimidates and yells over the fence and
runs when ready to confront!

We bought this place because it was completely private years before
he showed up. He has tried to ruin our privacy we lost several
animals due to questionable circumstances, all these animals were
healthy and young.

We are very good pet owners having been 4H sponsors and leaders.
This guy moved into a farm neighborhood and has no pets and doesn't
like them. Here is a picture of the drain area with spiked logs.

How would you go about removing such a scourge like this (the person
scourge) now picture your child running after a pet with his open
gate open all the time and tripping on this spiked speared logs and
falling on these?
Now you know how we feel!

You're right, this is a hard one to answer.

A man's property is sacrosanct but this guy has definitely crossed
the line hugely.

There should be some older property lines/allotment property values
stored by the county for the property as it was when first
registered. Maybe there is the information you need to prove all
that this guy has done. I'd look into the old county records

You've done right to document all that he has done, maybe the local
conservation groups can get involved to help you fight this guy and
the destruction he has caused. Make some enquiries.

Look for a lawyer to help you in a property fight over the damage he
has done as well… if you don't find a lawyer right away, bide your
time and keep documenting what is happening, you will find one
sooner or later. Pictures, video, and a journal.

Talk to newspapers too… this might make a good local story.

Usually guys like this are only pushed into another place by heavy
attention, make that happen, even if it means you start slowly with
a website and an online journal.

Are there other neighbors that this guy is also offending and
destroying property? If he has other neighbors talk to them, if not,
look at who owns that land opposite him and talk to the owners or
county about that property and if there are any records about it's
state of being.

I wish I had some real revenge that would make this guy move away
instantly, but these types thrive on being the bully, so I don't
think he'd easily be tricked into a situation that would
automatically make him forfeit his land.
But you might have more input here than I.

I have published your story here:


and the photo that you sent me here:


Maybe this will help to shine some light on the situation.
Best wishes,

Creepy Neighbor Next Door

Revenge Guy,

I need help with a horrible neighbor.

I bought my 1.5 acre lot about 4 years ago. The neighbor had lived
on his lot for about 8 years, and I guess was the first one in the
area. So he thinks he can dictate to you what you are going to do
with your property.

First, he started sneaking over and looking in the windows with the
excuse that he was "checking up on me".. I made it clear he needed
to stop. Then he told me I couldn't put up a fence because he uses
my yard to walk across to the next door neighbors. We put up the
fence and he threw a fit.

Then he told us we couldn't plant trees. We live in Arizona, and his
point was water preservation. I pointed out to him that his
(eyesore) yard has citrus trees all over, which are not native, and
we were planning on planting Mesquite trees which require little

He is "christian" and plays his talk radio Rush Limbaugh and
Christian Network the loudest he can, so we usually turn on our
Country music and point the radio his direction. Well, apparently
this antagonized him. He told my son (10 years old) that we were
going to burn in hell and that the world was going to end. I told
him to keep his religious beliefs to himself.

Where we live we can burn brush as long as it's not a bonfire. He
burns himself. We were burning one day and he told my son we were
idiots, so I told my son not to play at his house anymore. Then he
called the sheriff the day after we burned and told them we were
burning furniture! of course, the complaint was dropped because it
wasn't furniture and the sheriff could see that.

So I decided to call the county, because he has a second mobile home
on his lot, he got a permit and called it a "shed" but I wanted to
see if it could be removed because it's full of pack rats,
rattlesnakes and woodpeckers, as well as a hive of bees.

This set him off and he confronted me telling me he was going to
call the DOT on us. We have 4 cars, but all are registered and
licensed, so not sure what his basis is. Then said he was going to
call the county for everything and anything we do.

We recently got permits to build two porches. He stands at the
property line and just stares. when we left, he told the guy that
was leveling the area for the porch that he was creating too much
dust. Then he filed a complaint with the county that we were grading
without a permit. It was hardly grading. It was leveling the area
for the porch.

My husband was in the yard today digging holes to plant trees, and
the neighbor stood on his porch just staring. He's creepy and I want
him to get the message that he's messing with the wrong girl without
inflaming the situation and making it worse. After he filed the
grading complaint he has kept his radio low, he must have found out
from the county that he couldn't do that.

We are going to build a shed to block his view of our porch, and
plant some oleanders along the property line, but I would just love
to do something else.
What is your advise,
Burned in Arizona

When he watches set up a video camera to record him.
Be obvious about it.

When your shed is up attach some fake plastic surveillance cameras
to it, to "watch" the property line now that it is out of view.

Add a couple of lights that are on timers that you can set to go on
and off all night long… let him "see the light" before you burn in
Sorry, couldn't resist that one.

Document everything, I see this being a long battle with him so you
need to keep him on a short leash by recording everything he does,
complains about and threatens you with. Goodness only knows what
goes on inside his household, keep your son out of there!

And for the heck of it, post some "yard sale" signs around town so
that people can come and visit with him every few weeks or so.

Best wishes,

Adult Group Home Neighbors and White Trash Landlord

Revenge Guy,
I would like to get even with the man who owns the house
next to ours.

When we first moved in 8 years ago, the house seemed pleasant enough
– we were told that it was a rental and met the owner.

After our first few months of being in the house, things changed.

The owner put in a second driveway where he parks his landscaping
business equipment and supplies which have attracted rats. He has
completely let the yard on the property go and we found out that he
is renting to an unlicensed adult family home. The employees of this
home are rude and consistently block our driveway access. They do
not supervise the clients of the home and we’ve had to deal with
clients vomiting in the yard, running screaming and yelling in the
streets and the police and fire departments being called to the home
on a regular basis.

Complaints to the city about his landscaping equipment (he’s
violating a city ordinance by parking his trucks on the property)
and the Department of Health (about the lack of supervision at the
home) have gotten us nowhere and were thinking that it’s a lost
cause and we should just sell.

Meanwhile, the property owner is unresponsive to our complaints.

We found out that he lives in a nice little house overlooking the
ocean – we know that his neighbors would be mortified to have to
live next door to what we’ve been dealing with.

I’ve thought about taking photos of this eyesore with a description
of what’s been going on and mailing them anonymously to his
neighbors to let them know what a “gem” of a guy this jerk is. Got
any better ideas?
Pissed Off

Pissed Off,
It's nice to have shitty neighbors, eh? Especially shitty
landlord neighbors that rent to crappy people and just don't care.

First off, report this "adult home" to any and all agencies you can
think of. Federal, state, municipal, police, local councilman, all
of them. Talk to the newspapers too.

Take pictures, get the name of the place and create a Facebook or
MySpace page for them. record some videos and create a
account to post them. use the guy's real name and his neighbors will
find out about his absentee landlord practices.

Take pictures and post them on fences, trees, poles, bulletin
boards, everywhere and title the page "Is this how you want to
live?", put a picture of the home under that, and the guy's name and
address and phone number under that.
Let him squirm and open his neighbors eyes up!

Mail them to the above federal/state/local agencies too.

Hell, email me a picture and I'll post it here:

Pictures page

( I created this page on my site after reading your email, so send
me a pic and some details, ok?)

Embarrass the fuck out of this guy…. that's the only way to get
revenge because when a guy doesn't care about his landlord duties
the only thing that gets under his skin is what his
friends/neighbors think of him and that the law might crack down on

So get to work, start posting the pics, videos, all of it!

"Trespassing, Complaining About My Dogs" Jackhole Neighbor

Dear Revenge Guy,
I'm in a desperate situation. My neighbors have finally
crossed the line from obnoxious to full-out war. And they have the
law on their side. But let me start at the beginning.

We have lived next to them for what, 13 years perhaps. Throughout
that time they have committed egregious acts, but we have generally
looked the other way in favor of friendship.

For instance, years ago they had a sleepover. They had tents in the
yards and the kids had all their friends over. They were up giggling
and running around all night, and we didn't call the police.

They came into our yard and cut the lower branches off of a tree,
unwanted. We said nothing.

They came into our yard and threw chlorine tablets into our pool,
unwanted. We said nothing.

He attacked our gutters, unwanted. We said nothing.

At 7AM they are up hammering on the roof or building a stupid little
shed. They had a ladder so well-positioned that they could see into
a high window in my mother's room. They did wake me up at least
once. (We did eventually call the police once, but for some reason
it is legal between the hours of 7AM and 11PM)

But recently we got another dog. Unfortunately she barks a lot.
She's still young though. We let her out for a short period of time,
and yes, she makes noise. But this is where these jackholes cross
the line.

The first came when the police came to our house. Apparently the
jackhole next door called… because they were outside IN THE MIDDLE
OF THE DAY. It isn't like we leave her out overnight. But apparently
"his son was trying to relax".

The other day he claimed he saw the dog kill a bird. He said that he
had called the police and that they were sending someone over this
Tuesday. This did not happen. Needless to say, we also never found
evidence to confirm this unlikelihood. The dog wasn't even out very
long, once again.

But today was the last straw. The dogs were out once again in the
middle of the day for a short time, and they called the police. This
officer was a real douche, and I wish I could get revenge on him
too. He made up a bunch of lies, and then he wrote my sister a
misdemeanor, who was completely innocent. My mom wasn't home, so how
cowardly of them. I only let the dogs out once all day, and in that
short time he called the police. Coward. He doesn't have the balls
to come over and talk to us.

Sadly the law on "barking and howling" dogs is written in stone – it
grants the officer so much discretion that we can't fight it.
Despite another pig abusing his power and the neighbor making up a
crock to get them out here.

This is the price we pay for being nice people. Well, enough's
enough. I will go to any length to destroy this man. The only reason
we can think of that he's become such a grouch lately is because
he's out of work at the moment. Plus he hates us because we have
what is to him too many animals, and our house isn't perfectly neat
like his is.

Unfortunately, we never had security cameras, so we can't take him
to court on trespassing, and there's no way we'd win a harassment
charge. Like I said the law is on their side. I've been mulling ways
to get back at him since he first called the police like last year,
but now it must happen. It's on. We were never out to harm anyone.
Our little, broken family always went out of it's way to be good,
and we always let ourselves get walked over. This is the last straw.
I will do all I can to mete out the justice that society would deny
me. It's no wonder his kids have problems.

So I need some really viable options to protect my family from this
maniac, preferably by putting him in his place once and for all.


I feel your pain.
I have three dogs (municipal law says I can only have two), and dogs
And neighbors complain.

So, what I have set up is the Lentek Bark Free ultrasonic training
device that emits an ultrasonic sound so they dogs know that if they
bark they get buzzed, when there's no barking there's no buzzing.

So, this trains the dogs, all is good on my side.

Plus, there is an audible setting so that when the dogs bark there
is a second buzzing noise that tells me the Bark Free has sounded to
remind the dogs to stop barking.

The neighbors hate the buzzing as much as the dogs do, but I don't
care, I tell the cop I'm doing what I can, he walks away, no ticket.
So try that first:

The Revenge Guy shopping page

Now that that is settled, you need to start a journal of what the
hell this guy and his family are doing.

Write down everything. Take video and pictures of your place
monthly, detailing changes that have happened.

Get a security system, it's only a couple of hundred, less that a
lawyer… which you'll need after catching this guy trespassing

You could use to call him up and say you're from
local law enforcement and need to talk to him about some trespassing
charges… let him stew on that. Give him a verbal warning.

Talk to your other neighbors, surely you're not his only target.
Neighborhood bullies attack all they see. Get the details, form a
committee against this asshole.

Aim a telescope at his window, let him feel he's being watched. I
bet a friend has one they aren't using anymore so you can just
borrow it for a couple of weeks.

Yes, building noise is allowed during 7am to 11pm in most places….
but what's good for the goose is good for the gander. Rent a
jackhammer or something and let it rip right at 7am.

Or mow your lawn…. race your engine… something. And do it
regular like clockwork, same time and same day of the week for a
couple of months.

You have to MAKE justice in this world… the guy/group with the
loudest voice always wins because so few people stand up for
themselves or what is right. Look at low voter turnout for proof of
this concept.

I could go on with more stuff to do, but protection against this
creep comes first, don't you agree?
Best wishes,

My Neighbor Is A Thief!

Revenge Guy,
I have this neighbour, and he's a complete asshole…

While we're outside, we can hear him shouting and yelling out the
door and at us even for being too loud.

He complains that our dog ruins his lawn, even though he takes
fertilizer for our lawn and uses it to plant his own trees.

I'd like to get revenge on him for being so loud and stealing
fertilizer from us.


If the guy is intent on stealing your stuff for his
lawn, why not give him a real treat?

In your next bag of
fertilizer put in the bottom of it some ground beef, bacon
drippings, whatever you wouldn’t put into a composter. Add some
tampons and pads after they’ve been sprinkled with ketchup.

And just in case he’s had enough fertilizer use a bag of premium top
soil to get his attention.

And as an added bonus, include a
letter saying that “You have stolen this bag of XXX from us and we
now have the proof. If you ever harass us again the police will be
called and we will prosecute you.”

That should do it.

Best wishes,

Delirious From Lack Of Sleep

Hello Revenge God!

I need MAJOR help. My neighbors suck!

Let me preface by saying that I am generally very laid back, a
partier myself, but this is just way tooo much. I live in an
apartment community and My upstairs neighbors are extremely loud —
all day and night.

It is not the normal noise of someone above you. They sit on their
balcony all day during the day (I work from home) screaming over the
balcony throwing their cigarette buts off onto the grass and things
end up landing on my balcony.

They smoke pot that comes into my apartment.

They are fat and truck through their apartment like they are damn
doing gymnastics up there, which I know they are not (please see the
fat comment and sitting on their balcony all day long!).

The girl sits on her cell phone again on the balcony so the entire
neighborhood can hear her conversation. And they are doing this from
about 10 am until 2 am almost every day, depending on the day.

I think they are students and that is why they don't care. I mean I
will be in my apartment and I can hear them pull up in their raggedy
car and enter the building up the stairs that is how loud they are,
thump thump thump up the stairwell, which is not even next to my
apartment and we live in a VERY nice EXPENSIVE apartment community
— it is not a lower income area or place that you would expect

So.. what have I done thus far?

I have complained to the leasing office on 8 separate occasions,
including the pot smoking and noise.

The problem with the pot, is you can't really catch them in the act
b/c by the time someone comes, they are done with the joint. I have
made two different police calls for noise complaints.

Sometimes it is not late enough for me to call the cops, if they are
being this ridiculous during the day, I am not sure I can complain
about the noise. My apartment complex says "they deny all actions"
— which OF COURSE THEY DO! Wouldn't you?

So they say there is nothing they can do. Of course they don't want
to evict someone in this economy right?

I have a lease until March and for my sanity and lack of sleep I am
getting, I need to do something! I want them out out out! What can I
do? Please help!

Delirious from no sleep!


You need to start a journal right now and detail everything they do.
Dates, times, witnesses, calls you make.

Get a copy of your lease (I'm sure it's the same type the upstairs
assholes would have signed) and read it for what violates the lease.
Management companies don't really like to kick anyone out, but if
you can prove they should be, then they'll likely act then.

Talk with your neighbors, I'm sure you're not the only one mad at
these idiots, and having more than one person/apartment complaining
together will make them act much more quickly to get them out.

Video tape words wonders, if you don't have a camera to capture
sound and scene, then borrow one form a friend or buy one. This will
make much more convincing proof of the actions of the pigs upstairs.

With all of the above start a complete war on getting them evicted.

It will take some work, but you can do it!

You're not going to scare them out, pigs like this don't mind
sitting in their own slop.

And for immediate revenge, when they are out:

  • Spray their front door with liquid ass, spray their car door
    handless too.
  • Fill a large manila envelope (8.5 x 11 or larger) with a cup
    of confetti, add the confetti and squeeze the envelope so that
    it has a pocket of air, slide the open end of the envelope under
    their door and press down, shooting the confetti into their
  • Use to call them up at 3:00am and ask
    them if they need to re-finance their car, or need auto
    insurance (you can change the caller id to anything you like,
    record the call to enjoy later)
  • Start a website (use and
    select the "private registration" option, no one will know it's
    you) and tell crude things about them, using their real names…
    let them live with internet stink on their reputations for the
    rest of their lives (use a public computer when doing this,
    never use your home or office computer in case they can track
    the IP address)
    (note: when a business pisses you off, take a look at this site
    for an idea:
  • push wooden toothpicks into their locks and break them off
  • follow them shopping and report them to store security as
    possible shoplifters
  • post ads in local places about a room for rent, cheap, and
    help wanted, top dollar jobs, and add their phone number to it.
    For extra credit, say it's a night shift job and only call after

This should get you started, right?

Good luck!

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