Boyfriends are fickle, girlfriends are flaky. Revenge is not always the best course of action here, but who am I to say? Let the emotions roll!
(NOTE: generally RG does not answer ‘broken heart’ revenge requests. If that is your case please don’t send an email, get advice from a friend.)
Valentine’s Day is coming so here’s a story of a woman being screwed over. Seems so fitting!
Hi Revenge Guy,
I’m not usually a vengeful person but that’s exactly why I’m turning to you for help because this is a situation that POSITIVELY REQUIRES revenge be taken and justice be served.
If it can’t help me quit getting used then maybe they won’t do it to others like me again so here goes:
I have been in a live-in relationship for 3 years with the man i believed to finally be the ultimate love of my life. we mostly got along and were on the same unified track for the future or at least he never let on differently ever in any way.
We made an agreement in the beginning: he said simply that i couldnt “yell” at him, which we never fought EVER so i said ok wishing now i knew how vague and easily manipulated that would be later on. I was VERY specific however, in my “taboos” for him cuz i really liked him but i had some really bad stuff happen in past relationships and i had just clawed my way up from the bottom and was ok with just being friends with benefits cuz i didn’t really want a relationship again at that time cuz i wanted to be sure so the next time would be the last and i didn’t want to be alone if it wasn’t so i HAD to be sure.
He was so sincere and seemed so committed that i reluctantly agreed but with stipulations: Don’t LIE to me, don’t CHEAT on me and don’t be here NOW if you don’t see yourself even REMOTELY here in a couple of years cuz im really good with just being friends right now cuz i don’t ever wanna lose that.
Life went on and overall was good though we had a few bumps here and there – we toughed it out together and eventually pulled through. We had a real bad time last November when we moved into a new house with his elderly dad and he suddenly was out of work.
No biggie he always pulled through somehow. this time though he wouldn’t work for anybody he normally did when in a pinch and i tried to help him by selling furniture he made on ebay and other stuff through my friends but he just stubbornly wasn’t satisfied with anything and i began to feel the heavy financial burden (his dad too).
4 months went by and he started to be mean to me and treated me like crap when he treated everyone else like kings though i bent over backwards for him and he was spoiled rotten just as i always had only now he EXPECTED and demanded it but no longer earned it. 6 months went by and we were regularly sparring usually because he wasn’t even trying by then and was everybody’s friend but mine and was nice to everyone but me so i snapped finally and yelled as he says.
He didn’t say he could yell first all he wanted, treat me like crap, provoke me or push my buttons deliberately or whatever when he said i could’t yell at him or i never would have gone there. nor did i ever think he would do these things to get me there.
So he split to a town he SWORE TO EVERYONE he would never go back to and never mentioned he even considered it before then so it was just out of the blue and i was glad to see him go for the moment.
He called 6 days later and that’s how i found out but we kind of made up and he came home for about 3 weeks then again reluctantly went back but each and every weekend for the next 4 months we saw each other and were becoming closer and closer all the while making plans (HIM painting the picture) to “winter” in town and move up there in the spring but he knew I wouldnt without a job and being a smaller town then the one we had a home at, that would be difficult. Winter was coming in and i didn’ actt know how i could come much longer but he was coming home on weekends to but weather is super bad and treacherous so??
Next thing i know, we (couldnt really be called a fight) we disagreed cuz he said something that cut right to my jugular emotion and i didn’t fight with him instead I fell asleep on bottom bunk of camper cuz i couldnt leave being stuck in the mud as he got me til morning which when i went to leave was about the only time this fight occured but i was only crying and being in the mud was making it worse.
Finally i went home and let things cool off. week goes by and i call and he is being the meanest cruelest most horrible he has ever been to me and said for me to stay away etc. and then hung up.
2 weeks go by he comes down says he’s gone stay and talk leaves and goes back without telling me. I go up on halloween he acts as if all is well again, but im nervous cuz we hadnt talked at all but it wasn’t the nite to broach it yet and he was being really sweet while making his costume etc. never did anything else happen til the end of the nite when i went to go home cuz i had to work next day. all of a sudden he started being mean again saying it was over, etc. and as i went dazed and shocked to my car he kept saying see u next weekend.
i called but wasnt about to go up there til i knew what was up and he was rite back to being evil and mean and neasty to me. kept hanging up on me. soKeptbe i quit calling but he would call here and talk to my kids or his dad and first thing hed ask was about me and he sounded sad each time.
To make a long story short, too much more happened to squeeze in here, he is not the cheating type EVERYONE always thought but i knew in my heart he was cuz no man would be that cruel to someone who did nothing unless he was and his son coming home from school for the holidays was my trump card cuz he would not say.
Sure enough they tried to pass it off as only 2 weeks but his son Who stayed with us though his dad stayed up there, said they acted as if it was much longer.
he would not lket me confront any issues since halloween wouldnt talk to me and wouldnt allow me closure actn instead kept hanging up on me and to this day 1/19/10 we have not talked even to say ok its over and goodbye. EVERYONE HIS SON AND DAD INCLUDED IS SO PISSED AT HIM. my daughter says he didnt want me to find out so he could come back after winter and knowing cheating would never be forgiVEN but winter required shelter up there cuz october was already too cold and he wouldnt make it thru winter in the camper. supposedly it was a “sympathy fuck” for her dead husband but she began to expect more and since he was beginning to stay there. . .???
i dont care everything about it on both sides was wrong and she missed her husband so bad how does she think i now grieve for the love of my life? shes not sad now and he is not happy but he feels bad for her and not me or anyone he left behind here and he is a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON ACCORDING TO ALL WHO KNEW AND LOVED HIM, i will never trust another soul again and he knew that from the start should he not be right. so even if i had future happiness waiting i would run from it in fear cuz the 3rd time is not a charm and too many to believe again.
I want them both to feel the loss THEY CAUSED IN MY LIFE AND IM NOT VERY GOOD WITH COMING UP WITH IDEAS LET ALONE APPROPRIATE ONES that wont get me into trouble so please please please help me with this asap – theres so much more that makes this sound lame but this is really the short version after all this time has passed but i still cry everyday and he still drinks everyday and she isnt unhappy or missing her husband anymore.
BUT I DO EACH AND EVERYDAY. SO i need it for both and please help me before i get any nuttier over this!!!
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND ANY HELP YOU CAN GIVE
FOREVER GRAteful
p.s. she owns a tree nursery that her husband had so of course it is convenient for both but this happened cuz i am a friend of one of the husbands brothers at this nursery down here and they were old friends so he sent him up there at my request a few months prior to this to selln her some trees. thats when it started. told u there was too much more to put in here but it is way worse now and imperative i have revenge so it will quit consuming my life and i can hopefully move on then. thanks again!
Hi Some Lady,
Honestly, it seems to me that you hid the truth about this guy from yourself all the time. Starting with just screwing around, without a commitment, means that YOU were not ready to commit, not him.
You should have drawn a line right there.
As far as your “rules” what the hell? Relationships grow and mature, mostly, yours withered right from the start.
Twice, likely more, you let this ass back into your life?
Are you that desperate to need a man that you’ll invite such a piece of trash in?
The rule is you give a man every chance to love you and one chance to screw you over. You broke that rule.
First off, you need to cut all ties with this guy, his family, everyone. Hell, Hawaii always seems like a great place to live to me, why not move? As long as you can continue this pity party with his relatives, and whatever friends you might have left, you’ll never heal, you’ll never be over him.
As for revenge, here you go:
Start sending Valentine’s Day cards now. To Him. To Her. From people they might know in whatever town either might have been to. Addressed from strangers maybe. Let them think that the other has been screwing around. Use a phone call service and leave messages, love messages, on their voice mail. Change the caller id so the call can’t be returned. leave messages from people that say they owe money. play with their minds, you know what works best.
Send him a registered letter detailing all the money he owes you. Throw him into a panic. Wreak their relationship.
And damn it all, get some counselling and stay single until your daughter grows up. And no more FWB. Those never work well except for the guy that gets a freebie with no commitments.
Good Luck,
RG
Torture The User Ex-Boyfriend
Dear Revenge Guy,
I just came across your site this afternoon and wanted to ask for advice.
I was dating this guy for seven months and then like 3 weeks ago while we were making dating plans, he suddenly broke up with me because he was obsessing over my past relationships with guys in the past (he was my best friend so he knew this stuff).
I found it weird that he obsessed over it. Sure he wasn’t that good looking at all and was a total morbid guy that laughed at people’s expense but I liked that about him because I was just like him!
Turned out he fell out of love with me 4.5 months ago and just wanted my body. I get revenge on people often (he loved hearing those stories and helped out a couple times) but this time I am stumped at what to do. He decided he wanted to be “friends-with-benefits” with me, I said sure because this would get me close to him to get revenge, not sure what to do though.
I wasn’t heart broken for long, I just want revenge on the time I wasted on that pervert. I’m moving on with my life with college and such, I’m young anyways but would like some victory on his expense. Thanks for reading this.
Troublemaker
Hi Troublemaker,
This all depends how far you’re willing to go, right?
I mean you could pretend to have kinky sex with him, get out the handcuffs or scarves and tie him to the bed and leave him there, right?
Take photos and send them to his parents or some such trouble.
I mean, the sky is the limit, or is it?
You’re right to get on with your life, but this guy makes me SICK!!!!!
He just wanted to USE YOU? Fuck him, not literally, of course!
Anyways, I would add some eye drops to a drink he has, distract him and drop half a bottler in…. watch as he gets sudden stomach cramps and diarrhoea.
Or get some Liquid Ass and secretly spray him, or his stuff, with it.
Or make some phone calls and pretend to be another girl he likes, set up dates, let him be all alone…. waiting… waiting…
LOL
Maybe be a phony “Facebook Hottie” and start an online romance with him, then break his heart.
LOL
Have fun with torturing him, I would.
RG
Dear Revenge Guy
I’m sure you get a billion emails from people wanting good ideas. I have done silly things to get a good laugh when people have been mean or jerks to me in the past, but I am not sure what might be adequate revenge for my ex boyfriend.
In a nutshell, he came back a year after we broke up after he heard about my mother’s tragic death claiming that he felt really bad and that he was sorry for how things ended between us… we both apologized and continued to be friends for the next five years.
The last year of our “friendship” he totally changed and started being mean for no apparent reason sometimes. He would always say he was sorry after the fact and use some lame excuse… I started to get the feeling that he was doing this on purpose when he made a few stupid comments in reference to my mom’s death which started seeming a little suspicious.
It seemed like an honest slip of the tongue at first, then he said something that was really mean and insensitive. After talking to one of his friends, I learned some other incriminating information about him that also seemed to point to malicious intentions.
Some people might think that I should just never speak to him again and go on, but he has messed with me and the rest of my family by using my mother’s death as a means of being cruel… I don’t know what to do to settle the score that is within the bounds of the law… but this a**hole really deserves SOMETHING for being so cruel.
Please give me some ideas, if you can.
Thanks, Josie.
Hi Josie,
You have received some very good advice from your friends, don’t bother with him anymore, cut him out of your life.
He’s a narcissistic control freak. He cares only for himself and his needs, no matter what he has to do or say to anyone else.
But for your revenge, I’m sure that you have some nice dirt on him, something that you could really scare him with if only you had an anonymous way to contact him and let him know that his secret is out. Let’s OUT him.
Using his own bad behavior against him you can place that call, be it the police, a government official, whoever and for whatever purpose. Make him sweat knowing that he’s being investigated for that deep, dark secret.
That will be your revenge.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy
Hi,
About 5 months ago, my girlfriend who I had dated for 7 months, and gone after tirelessly for two years prior to that broke up with me.
I never got any real explanation as to why, so I kind of just went into this depression and dealt with things on my own, and I let her go…
About a month or so ago, the foolish me got a hold of her again to see how she was and see if I could fix things with her considering I loved her for a long long time.
We started talking and everything seemed ok, and for a month she kept telling me she still loved me too and wanted to try to working things out with me, but she kept telling me the problem was that her mom didn’t like me, so that was stopping her.
Every time I’d try to see her when her mother wasn’t present, she had an excuse not to, she seemed to be avoiding me, but still, I kept on, and she kept telling me how much she still loved me.
I have always done everything for this girl. I never said anything mean, I’ve always been caring and giving, and what I found out next made me sick.
Even after a month of her telling me she still loved me, I find out that she’s talking to another guy, and she was hiding it from me. Now, yes… I was jealous, but that’s not why I want revenge.
If she would have told me to start with, that she was talking to someone else, I would have understood but instead she just acted like my emotions were non-existent, and broke my heart again.
She knows she did it, and she doesn’t care. She’s evil and cold hearted. She could have easily spared me the pain that I feel now. I need revenge. What should I do? Thanks for your help Revenge Guy!
Ken
Hi Ken,
Revenge for the broken hearted, eh?
You made the rules and she ran with her own game plan. You want to re-establish the relationship but you want her all or nothing.
Well, get ready for nothing because if she catches you at this revenge idea you’ll never, ever see her again.
Text her being the “other guy” or message her some way being him. There are all kinds of online text services you can use, you don’t have to have a phone, just a computer and know who her cell phone provider is and their webpage for sending text messages online to a phone.
Send a letter telling her about his “history” with other girls. Make up some bad, sad stories of how he treated them badly and wants forgiveness.
Let her believe this letter, even if only for a few hours.
You’ll likely be found out, of course, but revenge will be yours, if only momentarily.
Otherwise just call up her mom pretending to be the local health center and leaving a reminder message for her daughter’s “treatment appointment”.
Honestly, it seems to me that what you want is revenge on her that will put her back into your arms. And I’m not much good at getting people back together after they’ve broken up. You might find some info and advice on this dating site, but that’s up to you.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy
Hi RG,
I have a bit of a problem.
I met this guy and we immediately hit it off. After a few months, he confessed that he had gotten in a little trouble before we met and had to go to court. He then mentioned he was $100 short for his court fees and asked me to loan it to him. I reluctantly did it because I have my own bills, but he PROMISED to pay me back that Friday with his paycheck.
The next day I went to court with him but waited outside the room. He said the Judge ordered him to pay an additional $75.00 or he would be arrested. Well I gave him another $75 on the PROMISE that he’d be giving me the money back that Friday. Friday came and I heard nothing from him all day (keep in mind he would call me at least 3 times a day prior to this).
I finally called him… guess what? NO ANSWER!!! I sent him text msgs, I called his friends, no one knew anything.
He finally calls me and has an ATTITUDE with me!!! He tells me he’ll give me the money the next day, I didn’t get it the next day either. This has been going on for a week now, he keeps telling me he’ll give it to me but never does.
I just left him a very nice voicemail saying that I’ve accepted the fact that he’s not going to give me the money back and I wished him the best in whatever he does… now I’m ready for the REVENGE! I’ve done things to ex’s before, you know the whole key the car, slash the tires thing, but he used my kindness as a weakness and I want him to PAY (literally)!!!!
Susie G
Hi Susie G,
Well, you’ve got great cover by letting him know he’s off the hook for paying you back. He really won’t suspect you of getting revenge now, just let this sit for another month or so, let him think you’ve totally cooled to it.
Then what I’d do is start putting up “Roommate Needed” signs;
“Person for hire”;
“Delivery service”;
And any other service you can think of. Make posters for everything with his name and cell-phone number. Put the posters up on street posts, in grocery stores, local employment centers, everywhere you can think of.
Let him pay you back in time wasted.
And let me tell you, next time get every loan signed for, a contract for repayment. People will be less likely to borrow when they have to sign a contract that could land them in jail for not paying. A loan contract should have:
The amount, pay back schedule, name of loaner and borrower, address of borrower and hopefully a third person to witness the signing of this loan agreement. And take them to court the moment they are more than 30 days, or two payback days have been missed.
And more revenge? If you have some dirt on him use it to embarrass him badly. Share the dirt to his co-workers, students, whoever he works with or goes to class with.
Push him into the light of public opinion.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy
