Revenge Guy Gets Even With Friends

The Revenge Guy
On Bad Friends With
The Revenge Guy

Need a little help getting even with friends that have done you

Maybe an oldie but a goodie revenge technique is just what you need
to help you get even and regain your stature as an important person.

Revenge Guy,

I have a neighbour and we have managed to remain relatively decent
toward each other for the past year, but recently she has been
making it harder for me to be able to hold back from doing something
nasty to her.

On my birthday I was visited by a worker from Children's Aid;
apparently some anonymous person reported that I was abusing my

After some brief conversation out on our shared deck about it, I
quickly figured out that it was my neighbour, because of her obvious
guilt and stunned look when I told her of things that were said to
the organization (that I made up to see the reaction).

I have planned a revenge on her for almost two weeks now and
hopefully when it happens it will be sweet, but now something new
has come up.

Her daughter and my daughter (both 8) play together. Her's is a bit
(understatement) of a bully.

Finally a few days ago the bullying resorted in my child with a
broken finger, which the other child, and mother, adamantly deny was
caused by this other kid (because everyone can break their own
finger on purpose without vomiting), so my little girl has no
apology and is left without closure to this traumatic incident.

I also overheard this woman and her sister (who does not know me at
all) saying that I am psycho and that my kids need to be in foster

These statements made me angry at first, but now I am frustrated and
I need to do something to get back at her. Any ideas? Nothing
expensive or violent (only because my 8-year-old is against
LabeledPsycho in Canada

Revenge JokerHi

First off, it's time to find new friends for your daughter. This is
something that just can't continue.

Then it's time to go after these neighbours with a razor-sharp test
of their community involvement.

Then, I'd put up 'Babysitter for hire' posters in grocery stores to
get her busy with callers.

Then, I'd anonymously send a copy of the poster to the Children's
Aid Society and let them know that she's mean to the kids in her

It's time to let her do a little explaining.

With an anonymous letter with the babysitter poster inside, she'll
have a hard time explaining that she isn't a babysitter, a child
care worker, and she isn't mean to the kids in her care.

That will be tit-for-tat. And I hope it evens things up for you.
Best wishes,

Revenge Guy,

I have this "friend" who is obsessed with MY MOM. All he talks about
is how he wants to do her and every time I retaliate he says
"consider your mom raped".

It was all in fun and games until he went
overboard saying he was gonna come inside one day and do her in her

So one night I went over to his house and forked it until
there was no yard left, because he had no trees. A week later he T.P’ed the HELL out of me and now I’m looking for a great way of
revenge, particularly something to do with his yard.
Any ideas….
Please Revenge Guy… I need your help!

Revenge JokerHi,
Yes, the yard is one of my favorite things to hit on.

Get yourself some granular grass fertilizer. Over a few weeks, one
night a week, go to his yard and carefully spell something out on
his yard. Don’t use too much fertilizer at once or he’ll see what’s

Over the weeks keep spelling the same word out in the same place
with the fertilizer.

It doesn’t matter if the grass gets burned from over-fertilization
(which will spell out what you’ve written in brown grass) or if you
successfully make the word grow faster and greener than the rest of
the lawn.
I’m sure you can think of a word.

Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Hi revenge guy,
I have some friends who treat me like crap, like nearly all the time
e.g. they have recently begun to call me names and stuff which can
be hurtful, also they try and embarrass me in public places and when
I have a go at them they always say "were only joking".

some of the
things they say are unforgiving e.g they pick on the way I act and
the things I do, they all think they’re rate "sexy" but in fact
they’re all gimps!

I really need some help in getting revenge on
these pricks but I don’t no what to do everything I fire at them, it
bounces off.
Please help.

Revenge JokerHey

First off I have to ask: why do you keep hanging out with people
that treat you so bad? That beat on you, call you names, etc?
Is your self-esteem so low that you need this type of interaction
with people?

Geesh, give your head a shake and find some new friends.

As far as revenge, when you know the group of them are out
somewhere, have someone call one of the parents pretending to be a
store security guard. Say you caught them shoplifting and you want
the parent to come right down to the store and get them before the
police are called.
That’ll get them into trouble.

And seriously, stay away from them.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Dear Rg,
My 7 friends are so fricken harsh on me i hate them! When my friends call
to ask if i want to see a flick with them they tell me of how im thier
last hope, and how none of their friends could go. Im feeling like a loner
now. they use me, im always the last one they turn to, they use my money
and dont pay me back, etc. Im fricken tired of it! They reveal all of my
secrets, they just play me like a board game, if they win they get what
they want.

On the holidays i was fighting with my group of backstabing friends. I
bought some expensive presents for my other friends(besides the 7
backstabbers) just before holiday break, they were really expensive
thoughtful presents. Then my 7 backstabbing friends went up to me and said
"we are really sorry" they grabbed the gifts out of my hands that were
meant for my other friends and told me that they were so glad to be my
friend again.

What should i do? I want a good prank, soemthing that will tell them not
to mess with me again.
From, Used

Revenge JokerHi Used,
You sure have collected a lot of losers to hang out with.

What you really
need is the backbone to stay away from these rip-offs before you end up
like them yourself. The ‘shopping lifting’ scam is what I’d suggest here.

Go shopping with your so-called friends and leave them in a store
somewhere…. a fancy clothing store will work well.

Get out of sight of
them and tell a sales clerk that you saw one of them slip something under
their shirt. Then high tail it out of there!

Whenever they hang out with you, set them up. That’ll help you be rid of
them once and for all.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Dear Revenge Guy,
I can really use your help. I loaned a guy that I thought was a friend
some money, but now he refuses to pay me. He even says that I never
loaned him the money and he’s telling friends that we both know lies
about me too. I’m 16 and can’t afford to not get the money back. How can
I get him and get him good?
Thanks, poorboy

Revenge JokerHi Poorboy,
It’s a fact that good friendships can stand the test of time, but few
can stand the test of money loaned. You’ve learned a hard lesson, my
friend. Always get loans in writing.

Big amounts, small amounts, when
it’s written down it becomes a thing of importance. Anything becomes
more important when put to paper and signed for.

That being said, what a
loser to rip you off after you did him a good deed. I suggest getting
any of the ready to go coupons I have on this page
and put them to work for you. Humiliate him into paying you back.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

hi revengeguy
my name is Nicki and i need help getting revenge on someone whos caused me
and some other people a lot of trouble.

Well it starts off like this: this
guy in my class has been nothing but trouble since day 1…my friend whos
in a different class got bullied by this guy in her class it got worse day
by day so i said that he couldnt do that to her and get a way with it so i
said i would sort this asshole of a guy out…i went up to him and had a
go at him i even threatened him by pranking his house saying that wherever
you go ill always be watching you every step you take every breath you
make might be the last…

i think he caught on to me though in class he
would always be getting me into trouble and i used to end up doing extra
work and detensions then one time he tried to follow me and friends as we
were going home i saw him and told my friends so then we got on to a bus
and just went anywhere and it was too late for him we had already

the next day at school i left the classroom in one lesson and i
left my bag and jacket as youre not allowed to take it with you well
anyway he must have gone through my bag because when i came back my phone
was gone!i looked for it everywhere and i couldnt find it…

i told the
teacher but she didnt believe me and said that we wernt allowed to have
phones anyway so i knew it was him but i couldnt do anything because i had
no proof or anything…a week later some guys in my class were asking me
if i had my phone on me i said no its at home (lied)they asked me if it
this colour and if it was in a case and the modle(i said yes but i told
them i still had it ) they kept saying that hes got it hes got it and that
i got jacked(stolen) at that point i knew it was him and plus he didnt
talk to me since he stole it…

i couldnt report the phone stolen because
my dad found it for me at his work just lying on top of a bin it was brand
new and had been left there for days so he got it and gave it to me it
worked and still had a sim card in side so i chucked that and put my one

but obviously when my phone got stolen by him i blocked the sim card
and anyway the phone was switched off at the time so theres no way he
could have got through to the pin code…

i know hes got my phone because i
saw him selling it to someone for about £30! he doesnt say anything to me
anymore well a few cuses here and there but i so badly want to get revenge
but i dont know how so i really need you help! so please help me get
revenge :(

Hi N,
This guy is just a common prick/thief combination, isn’t he?

You need to gang up on him with your other friends that have been bullied.
Get a picture of him and create a poster that says something like:
No looks, no brains, no future.

Have your friends help you posting them all over the place, in school,
outside of school, etc.

That will make him noticed and a laughingstock everywhere.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Dear RG,
I have this friend, she doesn’t respect me at all. I don’t enjoy being
her friend, but for some reason I feel like I’m forced to be her friend.

I feel like I have to do what she wants, or she will blackmail me! Every
time we get in a fight, I’m always the one to say sorry, and she doesn’t
even forgive me when i say sorry.

Then two days later, she calls me up
and says that she wants to be my friend again. She sucks up to my
parents, and my parents think she’s the best! She spends time with my

My parents even have a picture of her on their desk. I try to
be nice, both of her parent are in prison.

She is rough with my pets
too, and one time she accidentally killed one! It took me a while to
forgive her.

But for some reason she always ends up being my friend, no
matter how bad the fights are. She’s always coming to my parties, my
karate classes etc. Sometimes we both get invited to a party, and if i
can’t come then she rubbs it in my face.

When she’s at the party, she
will call me up and say, "Oh, man! This is the greatest party ever!
There’s cake! Ice cream!," and some of my other fav foods. Then when i
get upset, she goes, "Well, too bad you can’t be hear," and expects me
to be alright. I’m telling you, there’s nothing I can do to get back at

She doesn’t care about what I do to her, I need professional
revenge tips!
Please help!
From, Tortured

Hi Tortured,
Your friend is the classic loser, tearing you down to build herself up.

It’s unfortunate about her parents, but really, that isn’t an excuse for
her behavior and it seems to me that you’re quite used to explaining
away her actions to yourself and others while still taking shots to your
confidence and friendship.

Face it, she really isn’t a friend at all, she’s just someone to kill
some time with.

What I suggest is that you get a t-shirt that says "I’m with stupid" and
with a black marker write her name in (brackets) underneath it and wear
the t-shirt as much as you can. Even with her around.

Tell your folks about her bad behavior, they should understand.
And, my goodness, get some new friends.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Dear RG,
I have a bestfriend who can be really nice at times. She is only one year
older than me and we have been bestfriends for a very long time. However
she can be a real pain in the butt by being really cruel.

Everytime I come
over to her house to hang-out all she does is talk on the phone for hours
and hours while I just wait, but when I call her and she has a friend over
she tells me she is busy and has a friend over and hangs up.

I told her
how I felt but than she told me that she thought I would understand and
she wouldn’t do it again.

About the next day she does it again. I have
tried to do the same thing she did to me but she didn’t care much. Once I
told her a couple of my secrets because I trusted her like who I like.

next day everyone in my school knows every single secret of mine including
my crush! They all said it was my bestfriend..I was mad in about a month
or two I found out one of her secrets i told two people and she starts
having a anger tantrum and than she slapped me..

Now she says many things on the phone that hurts me. Other than that she
can be a good person but still I want to get her back for all these years
because she hurt me.
from, Hurt

Hi Hurt,
Your friend really sucks. I mean, how can anyone be so inconsiderate?
You’re a person, right? You have feelings, right? You are important too!

To help your friend find this out, this is what I suggest:
Take your friend out shopping at the nearest mall.

Go to the food court
and buy yourself a drink and get her some fries, something that will take
her a while to eat, but not too expensive. While she’s eating, say to her
"Oh, there’s my aunt…. I’m gonna go and say hi to her." Leave your
friend there eating what she has and ditch her. Head home. Let her find
out what it means to be rejected and left on her own.
That will send her a message!
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

I have a mad
crush on my "best friend." He says that I am his best friend, but yet, every time I see him, he doesn’t talk to me, and treats
me like a Cypher on the wall. He flirts with all the other girls,
especially my other friends, and he has played me ever since we were
friends. I am fed up, and tired. Help me to do something not dangerous
to give him a good taste of his own medicine!

Hi Agie,
It is time to put him in his place and with Valentine’s Day just around
the corner this is what I suggest:
Create Valentine’s Day cards (print them out on your printer, don’t
waste money buying them) for him and put the name of every girl you know
he knows on each one. One name per card. Make them really mushy. Make
him sweat thinking that all of these girls are in love with him. But
here’s the catch…. add to each card a little note about one of his
failings or shortcomings.
Like this:

Dear [boy’s name],
I have been in love with you for a long time and hope to get closer to
you soon. Accept this card as a small token of my love for you. And if
you get rid of that stupid hat [or get your teeth fixed or get a normal
haircut, something like that] you’ll have a chance to take this farther.
Love, [a girl’s name].

If he get’s 6 or 8 cards like this, telling of love and how bad his
breath is, you’ll make him very self-conscious and suddenly very nervous
around girls. I’ll bet he starts carrying around breath freshener, gets
a haircut, new clothes, whatever you point out that makes him such a
Have fun with this,
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Angie: Thank you for your advice, but that seems kind of mean. It might be
hard, but maybe you could help me think of a better idea that is not so

Hi Agie,
I think that by putting him in the center of attention that he so much
craves, while putting you down, is a sad way for him to live.
Why you bother letting him walk all over you is beyond me, no guy is
worth that.
You have to decide what you want to do, all I can do is steer you in the
direction. It may be that you just want his attention to be yours and
yours alone. Is that it?
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy


Wow! I have to admit that you are good. I guess that I get jealous when
he flirts with all of my other friends because he tells me that he cares
about me. I know, I shouldn’t let him walk all over me, but I’m not a
girl who stands up for herself alot. I get worried that it will cause
contention, and more hatred.

I just want him to be my friend, and to
treat me like he treats all those other girls that he chases and hangs
out with. I have to say that I don’t flirt with him and chase him a and
go after him because I am scared he will think that I am stupid.

But if
you could help me to do something to make him understand, that would be

I have told him on more then one occasion how I feel, and he
just tells me I’m his best friend and nothing will ever change that, but
it’s like he doesn’t care, because its never been different.

Hi Agie,
Some guys are like that. But in all honesty, keep him as your friend and
look for romance somewhere else. Boyfriends will come and go, but true
friends are very hard to find.

When he see’s you with someone else, he’ll get jealous. For now, you’re
the one always around whenever he has nothing else to do. As my momma
would say "Why should he buy the cow when he get’s the milk for free?".

So, stop hanging around and get on with your life…. it is passing you
by, you know.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Ok, I have a mate. he’s a good mate
who is a laugh to be around and someone I can rely on if the need
arises, but the main problem is – he’s a wuss.

He’s 17, yet still
takes orders from mommy and daddy, he’s afraid of getting on a bus,
meaning he cant go anywhere without one of his parents to drive him.

He’s a wet blanket for anything fun that isn’t playing with a deck
of cards or on a computer (always at his house).

I’ve tried whipping
him into rebellion, as most teens should have done by now (I’ve been
there and done that >:), yet he’s just a total pussy. he has to have
his friends around at all times, make sure he’s home before his
sister ‘so she can get in the house’ (even though she has her own
keys) .

He claims to go to the cinema whenever he wants, but
whenever me or any of his friends make plans, he always has homework
or his mom wont let him. Bollocks.

I know his mom (she’s our year
head at school) and she is really easy going. He acts like he does
other stuff like going bowling but whenever anyone makes plans with
him he blows them off because i think he’s just to scared that
people wont like him.

I dont want a prank that will destroy him
inside, i just need someone i can have proper fun with, something to
stir him up and maybe make him a little louder
I don’t want to play scrabble on Sunday afternoons the rest of my
PS.. I know he isn’t gay…..

Revenge JokerHi

You can’t change a person’s motivations. That’s going to be for his
future girlfriend/wife … whatever.

And a prank at him will probably ruin the friendship that you have.
But you can take a look at:

and share some of the prank files with your ‘wet blanket’.

If he likes his computer so much a lot of the pranks there will
scare him but good.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

Dear Revenge Guy,
I’ve been living abroad for two years, while my boyfriend has stayed
10000 km away, back home. I’ve made friends with this great girl, a
co-worker, who has supported me in all ways. She’s supported me by
listening to endless stories about my completely dysfunctional
relationship with my boyfriend. She’s even encouraged me to see
other guys.

For about a year now, I’ve had feelings for this really cool guy who
I have started sort of flirting with. He represented the fantasy of
leaving my boyfriend and having a meaningful relationship, but I’ve
never acted on it out of fear of ending up alone. She was the only
person who knew about this guy and what he meant for me.

A couple of days ago, my good friend decided to invite some friends
for a night out; she said she wanted to cheer me up and she invited
this guy along, so I could hang out with him. What a dear friend,
huh? Well, at a certain point I went to get cigarettes and when I
came back they were making out. I stormed out feeling like crap,
making a big scene. She called me the following day and said I was a
teenager, that both of them were single whereas I was not, and
therefore I didn’t have a right to be angry. The worst part is she
considered him a one-night stand, an honest mistake caused by excess
of wine. Some friend.

So, ok, she thinks I’m a teenager, I’ll be a teenager. I want
revenge. I can’t quite shout to her face what a bitch she is since
we work together every freaking day, and most of my friends in this
country I know them trough her. I want to do something sneaky and
make her feel like crap, just as a teenager would do. And since I’m
not 13, I want something a bit more sophisticated and elaborated
than sticking gum in her hair. Would you please help me, Revenge

Revenge JokerHi

Well, I say tit for tat here.

Watch her behavior around the men where you work.
After a couple of weeks start letting them know (as a big secret)
she wants to date them, that she can’t hold her wine and is great
for a fast hookup.

Your revenge will be complete.
Best wishes,
The Revenge Guy

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